Thursday, March 12, 2009

I need some advice...

So I need some advice - from other parents, but particularly other parents who have children with special needs. I need advice about how to manage this crazy life with all the appointments and busy-ness and how to look after yourself as well.

My dilemma is this. I am tired. All the time. We have appointments nearly every day of the week: therapy for A1's vision, physiotherapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, hydrotherapy, doctors appointments for kidneys, eyes, brain, hormones etc. Plus there are always little extras like looking at wheelchairs and IFSP meetings. There is always something. So I am genuinely asking other mums out there - how do you juggle all of this and still have time to take care of yourself as well? If I am going to care for A1 long term then that means I need to take care of myself too. I need a long term plan. Do you have a plan? What is your plan?


Sarah said...

Sorry but I don't have a plan at all. I am exhausted and I agree there is never any time to look after yourself.

But that being said, I know how important it is to look after yourself because if you are run down then who will look after the children, appts and therapies.

I will be checking back in case anyone else has some great ideas.

Family said...

Alison. My wife and I are reading some of the blog and your children are beautiful! She (Carmen) plans on posting soon. . . I am the "blogger" she does all the work with my son. She keeps a planner, I try to help out at every opportunity (not many some weeks). We will keep pondering on this and try to provide some good advice for you and us as we push through. The benefits of your hard work are plentiful and unmeasurable - I thank you for working so hard !

n0thingbuteverything said...

It's so tricky Alison. I hear you totally and I don't think we have no way near as many appointments as you to keep up ;-(.

Make sure you look after yourself!!! I've recently started doing pilates because I know I have to keep my body strong and I go swimming 3 times a week. I LOVE this time. It's very reinvigorating.

My other advice is get a support network around you. Through family, friends, church or other social group that you might be part of...ANYWHERE. I think that you need to know that it's OK to ask other people to help out in some ways - whether it's giving you an evening off or cooking a meal or whatever.

As you know, we have my sis-in-law with us at the moment and it's been an absolute godsend. I totally feel like I have my life back. I hope you're able to find similar networks of people that can help reduce the workload for you and give you a little time out when you need it for YOU!!!

All the best

ferfischer said...

I'm so glad you found me and me you! Anyway, to your question, I don't know. I'm exhausted all the time too, and I'm only 5 months into our "new" life with all of our appts. I also work full-time out of the home. The one thing that saves me is my sister, who comes to help every weekend. She helps me catch up on housework and other things, and entertains my other kids as well. I recently found a local special needs support group and it was such a great experience to be around other people who truly "get it" - it was like a little vacation, those couple hours. Right now, I don't feel like I'm taking care of myself at all. I hope to get some respite care from the govt soon, and then truly take some time for myself. Oh, also we've trained our nanny and another person on Cici's care, so we have that as well. It helps to know that I'm not the only one that can do it all. But the paperwork part - that is truly exhausting. Well, we're in it together!