Thursday, September 10, 2009

Would this annoy you?

Or am I just being petty? We all know that the answer probably is going to fall on the side of pettiness but that is not going to stop me from sharing it with all of you :)

We had swimming today which Ashlea loved as usual, but one of the other mums there did something I found quite annoying. After swimming most people dress their bubs on the benches at the side of the pool (they are quite wide - I can easily dress Ashlea there). If anyone wants a shower they have to use the communal 'rinse-off' showers that everyone uses after swimming and then we go to the change rooms to get dressed. Pretty straightforward right?

Well, there is one mum in our swimming class who, rather than do this like everyone else, goes and showers and dresses in private in the disabled changed rooms. With her non-disabled self and her non-disabled child.

Come on princess - surely you can slum it in the change rooms with the rest of us?

Do you think this is OK behaviour???

It really irks me and I really want to say something, but I just don't know if its worth it. I think the thing that cemented my annoyance was when I saw her get in her BMW to drive home!

So what do you think? Would this annoy you? Would you say something? Or do I need to just get over it?


Big brother, Little sister. said...

Hi there!
Okay it does annoy me. I probably would not say anything and no you dont really need to get over it!
I am of the belief that even though no-one is using it at the time you never know if someone will need to access it in a minute. It is the same as a disabled car spot, just because it is free does not give someone able bodied the right to drive in!
Perhaps you could give her the hint by using it next week and maybe she will realise that it needs to be free for a family/person who really needs it.

Naomi said...

Oh Boy! You are TOTALLY within your right to be annoyed - in fact if it were me I would probably be fuming and definitely would have said something. In NO WAY petty I think.

I've got all this to 'look forward' to as Zachary grows up, disable toilets, change rooms, parking spots....all put there for a good reason.

Sorry for the rant but things like that pee me right off! Even before I had a disabled child.

Lacey said...

I would definitely be annoyed. The BMW makes it worse because you know a lot of people that have money think they deserve different treatment. I'm not sure I would say anything though because you don't want to start something.

Fiona said...

It would annoy me, and because I am often outspoken and tactless I would probably say something too.
If there are suitable facilities available for non disabled people then she should be using those, but I do think sometimes people are just not aware of how essential disabled facilities are for some people.

For those of us with able bodied children they often offer more space and are easier to negotiate in, but for a disabled person they can be the difference between going out or staying at home.

I would politely and subtly draw her attention to this (but then as I said earlier I can also be a bit tactless sometimes!!).

Sarah said...

Yeah would definately annoy me!

n0thingbuteverything said...

A while back this would have bothered me to the point of anger and resentment. But now, I have a different mindset.

That's not to say I wouldn't think what she is doing is a good thing, but more that I would prefer to preserve my energy for other things than being angry with someone like that woman who just doesn't sound worthy of bringing down my day.

BUT that's not to say I'd do nothing -
So, I'd take a different approach. I'd be suggesting to the swimming pool that they put a sign on/inside the disabled toilet door reminding people that they are for the use of disabled visitors to the swimming pool. And also quietly suggest to staff that they have a word with her - it would be much easier all around if a staff member were to approach her and remind her that it's not really appropriate for her to use these facilities if she/her children do not have a disability. ;-)

Rachel said...

If I was in your position I'd be pretty frustrated too!! The lack of consideration for others is appaling.

However, you mentioned that the rest of the place is communal. There might be a reason she gets changed in there? She may have had a breast removed because of cancer or has a colostomy bag hidden underneath, or has a huge scar and she is too embarrased to change in public.

Just another perspective on the matter. As you know, things arent always what they seem!

Or maybe she is just being rude, obnoxious and precious!! In that case, turf her OUT!

Susan, Mum to Molly said...

I'm with Di. My first thought was: ask the staff at the centre to speak to her and to point out that that facility is only to be used by patrons with a disability.

Let them be the bad guys (which is what they should be doing anyway). Definitely not petty. Definitely right to be annoyed.

I would also be tempted to pointedly use that room a few times.

Alison said...

Thanks everyone for your comments - it is good to know that I am not the only one!

I think I am going to do what a few of you suggested and ask the swimming centre staff to deal with it. I may have to start using the room myself too - although the benches aren't as wide as the ones by the pool.

Also Rachel - I did consider maybe she was trying to hide a colostomy or something (didn't think of the breast thing) but seeing as she wears a bikini in the pool I'm pretty sure she isn't hiding anything!!