Friday, August 27, 2010


I'm feeling a little overwhelmed at the moment.

Life isn't any more stressful than usual, its just that sometimes it feels more overwhelming than at other times.  And its the little things that are starting to push me over the edge.  Those little things that happen, or have to happen without fail in order for life to continue.

Things like...
- making up medications
- making sure we have enough of the medications as well as current scripts (anyone else feel like they're at their pharmacy nearly every week?)
- making up formula
- 2nd hourly feeds
- cleaning feeding equipment
- lifting the wheelchair in and out of the car

There are also the things that don't need to happen every day, but they still happen.... things like Ashlea having a screaming fit every night at bedtime.  She is especially vocal tonight as she had a late cat nap this afternoon - so her strength for protesting has been renewed.

I sound like a whinger right?  I really try hard not to whinge, and I don't even feel like I need to have a whinge about these things as such.  I don't mind doing each of those things, it is just the unrelenting monotony of these tasks.

I suppose a lot of parenting, special needs or otherwise is monotonous, but I guess that as your kids get older you can be a bit more flexible.  There is no flexibility in our routine.  No let up to the daily things that need to be done.  Anyone else have some of 'those' tasks that just have to be done?

But the really big worry at the moment is MONEY.  Or rather lack thereof.  We always run at a bit of a loss, but my emergency dental treatment has pushed our credit card debt to a limit that is just frightening.  Maybe I should have just got them to pull the tooth out?  At least it would have saved me over $2K!!  Anyway, I am thinking that I am going to have to increase my hours at work from 1 day a week to 3 days.  I just don't know how I will cope physically and mentally with doing all the things I do now, but adding in 2 extra days work.

Working SN mums....I need your help!  How do you manage to get everything done???  I know a lot of you do it - I just need to know HOW!!


Sarah said...

I think the realisation that our monotonous will be continous is what stresses me out the most.

The constant appts, scripts/meds, the equipment, the heavy lifting lifting of a 5 year old in and out of the car!

Your NOT a whinger at all! I think it's totally normal to feel consumed by life like this...I just wish I could suggest a quick fix solution.

I really hope you don't have to go to work 3 days a week right now. I don't know how you manage to do what you do already and not burn out. Money does suck though as we all need it to survive in life but I really hope there is some other alternative for you.

I always get strength from you Alison, you do a great job of parenting all 3 of your girls.

ferfischer said...

I totally understand what you are talking about. Like Sarah said, I think the hardest part is knowing that our monotonous will not be ending. It's like a continuous marathon. And it's exhausting.

I work full time - but i can work from home, i work at night, i work on the weekends, and it's really, really flexible. I'm lucky. Without that, I'm not sure what I would do.

And to be honest, I DON'T do it well. I'm always stressed and tired and just feel like I'm hanging on by a string. I need some strategies myself!

Big brother, Little sister. said...

Alison, I have no idea how it could be done!When the girls are at shool then it would be way more manageable?
All those thoughts and feelings resonated with me too....its just routined all the time and yes has that forever feeling about it. xo

Anonymous said...

Hang on in there! You are doing well.

Anna said...

I know exactly what you are saying. I feel like I live at the pharmacy. Our life totally revolves around PEG feeds too. It is so hard to be flexible, and when we do just do something spur of the moment (like our trip to the beach on Saturday), we have to live with the consequences for days (Ryley vomiting from tiredness).

I work 3 days a week too and sometimes the stress nearly kills me.

I do try and balance everything, but I often wonder at what cost to my own health? The pros of working 3 days is that you do manage to get a routine going. You do spend more time thinking about something other than being a parent/carer.
I do enjoy going for lunch with my colleagues, and I often find I can sneak in those trips to the pharmacy on my lunch break, which means it is quick and easy!

The things I let go are things like having a spotless house. I just can't manage to do EVERYTHING after all.

Good Luck with the decision. I know how hard it is to make and then make work.


Marie said...

I have a really flexible job and I let a lot of things go....I'm praying that you are already feeling less stressed.