Monday, March 25, 2013

Easter Harade

Today is the school Easter Hat Parade - otherwise known as the Easter Harade by Ashlea.

Sadly I couldn't attend as I have to work.

I am finding it increasingly difficult to juggle all the different needs of everyone in our family now that I am back at work.  It's not the work itself - that part is OK - it's that I don't have time to do all the other things I need to do now that I am back at work.  Ashlea still has multiple appointments.  Emma's needs have gone through the roof (not least of which is keeping me up until midnight every night as she can't wind down to go to sleep and then backing up with a mega meltdown at school drop off).  Murray is sliding into depression as he realises what he can no longer do.  No wonder poor Audrey wants to escape to next door all the time.

I really don't know what to do.  I would like to not have to work full stop (wouldn't we all).  I feel like there is only so much I can do and I am pretty much approaching breaking point at the moment. My sanity is what ends up being on the line!

If money were no object I would just leave work to look after my family, but money is a significant reason to keep working (although I've just done the Centrelink calculator and apparently we are only $20 worse off if I work 1 day a week compared to 3 days...what's with that???).




Missy said...

Oh Alison... I wish I could wave a magic wand and make everything okay for you or take away the stress of money so you could do all the other things you need to do.
I am sorry Emma's needs have escalated so significantly and that you are being consumed with both her and Ashlea.
Thank goodness for super neighbours!!
I don't know what to say other than I hope the juggling gets easier. I wish I could do more to help....hugs x x

Big brother, Little sister. said...

Alison, I am so sorry things are so out of control right now with it all landing on you. I think you need work for YOU? Or as an escape even if for a day? Is a day available at all? Something needs to change though so you have more support for your current normal but I am unsure what is available and am sure you are linked into what you have in your area. I just hope things start improving all round xx

Katie Leeks said...

Centrelink always confuses me. i'm not sure if it's the same in nsw but in vic, you can go into Medicare and see a Centrelink family assistance worker. may be the best way to get info.
I do understand work being a break-im usually ready for a cup of tea and a vent to workmates after a chaotic morning just getting out the door to GET to work! But if you sort out the money side of things, at least you can make an informed choice about dropping a day etc.

Deb said...

That's just such a huge load to have on your shoulders right now! It is no wonder at all that you are feeling stretched far beyond the norm. Although the bigger picture may be unchangeable at present, maybe some small improvements would take some of the pressure off? I'll be praying especially for Emma's appointments that are coming up with the paed. and psychologist. I can understand why her current emotional state is really distressing for you.

Alison said...

Katie - I work from home - which has lots of advantages, but it also doesn't provide the same 'break' from regular life that working away from home does.

Anonymous said...

I've seen lots of ads around for jobs where you can earn $5,000 a week working in your spare time from home. You could try one of those.

Did I just get the prize for the worst piece of advice ever?

And even if I sign it "anonymous" will you still know who it is?

Alison said...

Ha ha Anonymous - I have quite a few cheeky friends so it is hard to know which one you are!! I might need a hint...

Sandra said...

Is it possible to do some work away from home? even at the local library or a friend's house? It might just give you a bit of separation from home and work, and may also help you to get thru your paid work a bit more efficiently.

I assume you have had all sorts of advice , both welcome and unwelcome but here goes - just delete this if it is irritating. The thing that worked the best for my anxious/ADHD child when she was younger was really boring bedtime routines - we did the same thing every night in the same order. At times it did take a lot of effort but the sameness seemed to help her to wind down. Can you maybe get Murray to read to Emma or do some quiet non screen activity as part of the process so you have a bit less emotional investment.

Anna said...

Oh Alison. You firstly need to make sure you are getting some kind of a break. Is it possible to only work 1 day a week for now? Or do you have to work the 3 days? Will Murray seek support from the GP/Psychologist?
For Emma, there are quite a few meditation apps out there for the ipad/ipod/iphone. Would she listen to one of those until she falls asleep? I used to use Yoga Nidra. I wonder if there is a kids version?
Can you go to the appointments that are critical and then all others, reschedule?
Wish I could help you out more.
Thinking of you and sending you love really hoping this path gets easier for you soon x

Naomi said...

Apologies for the unsolicited advice from a complete stranger, but there are a couple of good apps now for kids to help them relax. I know you've done the awesome anxiety course but these are just little tidbits that you could do at home. One is called headspace, which may be a little old for her but it is worth trying. The other one is called smiling minds. It is Australian, free, and has relaxation scripts for different kids. If you're getting minimal sleep, then anything free is worth a thought.