This gorgeous child is really struggling.
Her behaviour is really testing me. The anxiety, the sore tummies, the tantrums, the not eating - I'm in over my head.
Once again it has been interesting to see people's reactions. Some people are very sympathetic and understanding but then there are others who are downright judgemental. This post is aimed squarely at them.
STOP JUDGING MY PARENTING!!!
It is so easy to assume when a child is struggling that it must be because the parents are doing something wrong. In reality it is more likely that the parents are doing the best job they can with the resources they have available to them.
I am doing the best job I can with the resources I have available. Judging me isn't going to help - all it's going to do is add to my sense of isolation. I know this is way more ranty than I usually get but I have a bee in my bonnet about this at the moment because those who are quick to judge seem to not realise that there is no logic to their argument.
Look at my other two kids. Look at Ashlea - she is thriving. We do everything possible to keep her well and happy - and she is both of those things. Now take a look at Audrey. Not only is Audrey very low maintenance she is also lovely, sweet, obedient and easy going. She is the model child.
How can I be doing such a bad job with one child but such a stellar job with my others???
There has got to be more to the story. Genetics and temperament have to come into the equation. Perhaps even birth order and the increased sense of responsibility that comes with being the eldest? All my children have had the same parenting experience and yet Emma's behaviour is wildly different to her sister's - surely that alone shows that there are other factors involved.
I know I'm not the perfect parent. I have plenty of areas that I could improve - we all do.
But I am doing the best I can with the resources I have available.
* In reality the judgers are in the minority
** I have many awesome friends who are anything BUT judgemental
*** Yes this is a good reminder to myself as well to not judge other parents
**** And yes it is a bit narky but it is anniversary month and I am feeling narky about lots of things....stay tuned...there may be more rants to come...